A Poem For Mama

i was a little girl
knew nothing about life
all i knew was crying and shouting to my mom
i grew up to be a teenager
knew something about life 
but not at all 
tried bad things for so many times
had bad attitudes for those moments
and i admit it,
until now ..
i do still have it though i try my best not to do it
mama,
you always taught me about life
you always said to me that i was your beloved daughter
you always there for me no matter what
you always give me a true love and care
and when i was down and tumbled
you came to me and said,
" you can face anything "
mama,
i miss you so badly ..
i miss those moments that i was with you
spending times with you
i miss your voice
i miss your presence 
i need you by myside now ..
i dont know what will i do without you
i never go a day without my mom ..
mama,
i did some painful things to you
i am sorry for that ..
i wont do it to u again ..
when i was near you,
i never realized that you were so important to me
but when distance lies between us,
i conciously know that you are the most precious person in my life
without u ,
i am nothing ..
mama,
i miss your laughter
i miss your smile
the way you told me about your days
the way you asked me for food
the way you scolded me because i wont eat
the way you remind me about life
wish you were here mom ..
i wanna talk to you and share my days with you
how struggle i am through these days 
how dumbed i am with these days
and how i need your attention now ..
i still remember when i was a kid,
i always wanted something that extra-ordinary in life
and you always tried to give me those things
though sometimes it was out of your mind
and i still remember about those times,
we had a fight , we screamed ..
we argued like hell ,
but we still can make it through ..
cos i know i am like you ..
and when i told you about my relationship 
you just smiled to me and say " let it be the way should be .."
and whenever i had problems i my relationship,
i always told you about it ..
your advices ..
your suggestions ..
never wrong ..
you always comfort me with anything you have 
you always give your best to me ..
i will not be able to reply and give it back all the kindness you have been given to me
i just want you to know that i love you so much
and wont ever go from you
there's a lot of words to say now mama ..
a lot ..
i wouldnt finish ..
this is just a little of my feeling ..
come and see me mama ..
as soon as possible ..
cos i miss u a lot ..
i do mean a lot ..
i have to go mom ,
i need to study now ..
i miss u ..
and i will always love you ..

5 april 2009

Joanna